July 4th 2003 Las Vegas-McCarran International Airport - Combining American patriotism and campaigning necessity, Chest Notgerman has set off to the land of tyranny to locate the head of Saddam Hussein.

"I feel privileged to be able to aid my fellow Americans by making it a little safer to sleep at night, fight for the little Iraqi in all of us, offer the Neowhig support to our fighting men and women standing strong in a foreign wasteland and to help make my campaign fund a little bigger.

Notgerman will be taking a small group to assist in his quest. The group will be led by Neowhig Campaign Strategist William Grim. Grim had spent a good part of the recent Iraqi skirmish on the front line as a journalist for Broken Newz.

"If he is still alive, we will find him." Says Grim, "We will look under every ounce of rubble, each square inch of his remaining bunkers, and every gay bar in eastern Baghdad.