Terrorism-- While the Neo-Whig Party is generally supportive of President Bush's policy of pre-emptive strikes against terror nations, we believe that the Bush Doctrine doesn't go far enough. When elected, the Smithy Administration will establish the Nuke 'Em If They Look Cross-eyed Doctrine which asserts America's right to asswhup any nation that develops a 'tude.

The United Nations-- The Neo-Whig Party believes that the United Nations is very valuable, especially its headquarters on the East River of Manhattan. When elected, the Smithy Administration will immediately begin negotiations to convert the UN into condos.

NATO-- The Neo-Whig Party favors moving the headquarters of NATO from Brussels to Warsaw. Additionally, when elected, the Smithy Administration will call for the capital of Poland to be moved from Warsaw to Berlin.

EU-- The Neo-Whig Party believes that the European Union and the mighty European Union Army provide an effective means to hold in check the growing military and territorial aspirations of Montenegro. When elected, the Smithy Administration will pull both American troops out of Montenegro.

Free Trade and Globalization-- The Neo-Whig Party is firmly committed to the principle of free trade and will not rest until every Third World village has a Starbucks. When elected, the Smithy Administration will establish a Department of Franchises and Malls in order to assist in the complete takeover of foreign markets by American-owned businesses.

Canada-- The Neo-Whig Party believes that good relations between our two great countries are essential for world peace. When elected, the Smithy Administration will negotiate a landswap deal with Canada where the United States gets British Columbia and Alberta in exchange for Canada taking Massachusetts and West Virginia.

Mexico-- The Neo-Whig Party believes that immigration from Mexico should continue unhindered as long as all of the Mexican women crossing the border look like Selma Hayek. When elected, the Smithy Administration will establish aesthetic standards for immigration from Mexico and other Latin American countries.

France-- The Neo-Whig Party favors the restoration of the Bourbon monarchy in France. When elected, the Smithy Administration will assist Louis LXXVIII, the heir to the throne, and the Free French Forces in overthrowing the criminal Chirac regime.

The Middle East-- The Neo-Whig Party is in favor of a joint Christian-Jewish Crusade to rid the Holy Land of infidels. When elected, the Smithy Administration will signal to Yassir Arafat through diplomatic channels that it's time for him to kiss his sorry ass goodbye. Wait, are we too late here?